Ajant
19-10-2007, 03:52 AM
This virgin girl is on the phone and asks her boyfriend to come
over and have dinner with her parents. Since this is such a
big event, the girl announces to her boyfriend that
after dinner, she would like to go out and make love
for the first time.
Well, the boy is ecstatic, but he has never had sex
before, so he takes a trip to the pharmacist to get
some condoms. He tells the pharmacist it's his first time and
the pharmacist helps the boy for about an hour.
He tells the boy everything there is to know about condoms and
sex.
At the register, the pharmacist asks the boy how many
condoms he'd like to buy, a 3-pack, 10-pack, or family
pack. The boy insists on the family pack because he
thinks he will be rather busy, it being his first time and all.
That night, the boy shows up at the girl's parents
house and meets his girlfriend at the door. "Oh, I'm
so excited for you to meet my parents, come on in!"
The boy goes inside and is taken to the dinner table
where the girl's parents are seated. The boy quickly
offers to say grace and bows his head.
A minute passes, and the boy is still deep in prayer,
with his head down.
10 minutes pass, and still no movement from the boy.
Finally, after 20 minutes with his head down, the
girlfriend leans over and whispers to the
boyfriend, "I had no idea you were this religious."
The boy turns, and whispers back, "I had no idea your
father was a pharmacist."
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And for the fella's....
1. Are you a chicken farmer? ’Cos you can definitely raise a ****!
2. I've just moved you to the top of my 'to do' list.
3. Nice legs ... what time do they open?
4. Apart from being sexy, what do you do for a living?
5. You ever slept with a C-grade celebrity? Cause I was on Big Brother!
6. Be unique and different, just say yes.
7. The voices in my head told me to come talk to you.
8. If I were to ask you for sex, would your answer be the same as the answer
to this question?
9. Did you clean your pants with Windex? I can practically see myself in
them.
10. I’m not going to use some corny pick-up line on you because I can tell
you are smarter than that.
11. Do you want to see something swell?
12. (Spill drink on girl) Now that you’re soaking wet, how about I take you
home and get you out of those wet clothes?
13. The word of the day is "legs". Let's go back to my place and spread the
word.
14. I like every bone in your body, especially mine.
15. Hey baby, let’s play army. I'll lay down, you can blow me up.
16. If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put U and I together.
17. My face is leaving in 15 minutes ... be on it!
18. My love for you is like diarrhoea ... I can't hold it in.
19. If you and I were squirrels, I'd store my nuts in your hole.
20. Wanna go out for some sex and pizza?
.... What’s the matter, you don’t like pizza?
21. I wanna use your thighs as earmuffs.
22. I may not be Fred Flintstone but I can sure make your bed rock.
23. You know that shirt is very becoming on you ... of course, if I was on
you I would be coming too.
24. Why don't you come over and we can do some maths in the bed; add the
bed, subtract the clothes, divide the legs and we can multiply?
25. Excuse me miss, do you give head to strangers? (No) Well, then allow me
to introduce myself.
over and have dinner with her parents. Since this is such a
big event, the girl announces to her boyfriend that
after dinner, she would like to go out and make love
for the first time.
Well, the boy is ecstatic, but he has never had sex
before, so he takes a trip to the pharmacist to get
some condoms. He tells the pharmacist it's his first time and
the pharmacist helps the boy for about an hour.
He tells the boy everything there is to know about condoms and
sex.
At the register, the pharmacist asks the boy how many
condoms he'd like to buy, a 3-pack, 10-pack, or family
pack. The boy insists on the family pack because he
thinks he will be rather busy, it being his first time and all.
That night, the boy shows up at the girl's parents
house and meets his girlfriend at the door. "Oh, I'm
so excited for you to meet my parents, come on in!"
The boy goes inside and is taken to the dinner table
where the girl's parents are seated. The boy quickly
offers to say grace and bows his head.
A minute passes, and the boy is still deep in prayer,
with his head down.
10 minutes pass, and still no movement from the boy.
Finally, after 20 minutes with his head down, the
girlfriend leans over and whispers to the
boyfriend, "I had no idea you were this religious."
The boy turns, and whispers back, "I had no idea your
father was a pharmacist."
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
And for the fella's....
1. Are you a chicken farmer? ’Cos you can definitely raise a ****!
2. I've just moved you to the top of my 'to do' list.
3. Nice legs ... what time do they open?
4. Apart from being sexy, what do you do for a living?
5. You ever slept with a C-grade celebrity? Cause I was on Big Brother!
6. Be unique and different, just say yes.
7. The voices in my head told me to come talk to you.
8. If I were to ask you for sex, would your answer be the same as the answer
to this question?
9. Did you clean your pants with Windex? I can practically see myself in
them.
10. I’m not going to use some corny pick-up line on you because I can tell
you are smarter than that.
11. Do you want to see something swell?
12. (Spill drink on girl) Now that you’re soaking wet, how about I take you
home and get you out of those wet clothes?
13. The word of the day is "legs". Let's go back to my place and spread the
word.
14. I like every bone in your body, especially mine.
15. Hey baby, let’s play army. I'll lay down, you can blow me up.
16. If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put U and I together.
17. My face is leaving in 15 minutes ... be on it!
18. My love for you is like diarrhoea ... I can't hold it in.
19. If you and I were squirrels, I'd store my nuts in your hole.
20. Wanna go out for some sex and pizza?
.... What’s the matter, you don’t like pizza?
21. I wanna use your thighs as earmuffs.
22. I may not be Fred Flintstone but I can sure make your bed rock.
23. You know that shirt is very becoming on you ... of course, if I was on
you I would be coming too.
24. Why don't you come over and we can do some maths in the bed; add the
bed, subtract the clothes, divide the legs and we can multiply?
25. Excuse me miss, do you give head to strangers? (No) Well, then allow me
to introduce myself.