sick jokes

[jony9]

think ur having a bad day?
imagine this:
ur a siamese twin
joined at the hip, ur
brother is gay but ur not,
his lover is coming over
and u are the only one
with an arsehole!!!

[Jazz 16]

think ur having a bad day?
imagine this:
ur a siamese twin
joined at the hip, ur
brother is gay but ur not,
his lover is coming over
and u are the only one
with an arsehole!!!

[Mufc Majik]

think ur having a bad day?
imagine this:
ur a siamese twin
joined at the hip, ur
brother is gay but ur not,
his lover is coming over
and u are the only one
with an arsehole!!!

Haha Quality!

[owenrooneyruud]

LOLLLL!!!!... made my day (whats left)

[reddevil11]

very good, needed cheering up.

[Diosa]

ahahaha

[Jamesy_United_4_Life]

What do you call an ethiopian with a leather jacket on ?
A gear stick

[Busbymalone]

how do you know if your sister is having her period?











your Dad's dick tastes funny

[versa]

how do you know if your sister is having her period?

your Dad's dick tastes funny

That was indeed sick - a double incest.

[Miss_United]

That was indeed sick - a double incest.

Oh my GOd Yuk!!!!

What's the difference between acne and a paedophile?

Acne doesn't come on your face until you're twelve.

[versa]

What's the difference between acne and a paedophile?

Acne doesn't come on your face until you're twelve.

That was a good one actually.

Or do we actually like sick jokes?!

[goonerkas]

Stephen Hawking can finally achieve an erection now that doctors have disabled his pop-up blocker

[Ozblu3]

how do you know if your sister is having her period?
your Dad's dick tastes funny

There once was a little boy who was celebrating his 11th birthday.

He decided to test his family to see if they remembered his birthday, so he goes downstairs to his father. "Bet cha' can't guess how old I am today", the boy said.

The father has no clue and finally gives up. "I'm eleven!" the boy exclaims.

Next he goes in the kitchen, walks up to his grandma, and says, "Bet cha' can't guess how old I am today".

"Let me give it a guess", grandma says and sticks her hand in his trousers.

She plays with his testicles for about an hour or so (squeezing them; moving them back and forth), takes her hand out of his trousers, and says, "You're eleven years old".

"How did you know?" the boy asked.

Grandma replied, "I heard you tell your father".

[Ozblu3]

Three guys go to see a witch doctor about their problems.

One has a smoking problem, one is an alcholic and one is gay but wants to change.

The docter puts a curse on them that if any of them indulge their habits again they will die.

Two days later the alcholic dies because he gave in and had to drink.

The next day the gay guy and the smoker are walking down the street together. The smoker sees a cigarette lying and the ground and stops to stare at it. lol.

[Ozblu3]

The Swedish Student
At a local college, there was a dance.

A guy from America asked the girl from Sweden to dance. While they were dancing, he gives her a little squeeze, and says, "In America, we call this a hug". She replies, "Yaah, in Sveden, we call it a hug too."

A little later, he gives her a peck on the cheek, and says, "In America, we call this a kiss". She replies, "Yaah, in Sveden, we call it a kiss too."

Towards the end of the night, and a lot of drinks later, he takes her out on the campus lawn, and proceeds to have sex with her, and says, "In America, we call this a grass sandwich". She says, "Yaaah in Sveden, we call it a grass sandwich too, but we usually put more meat in it."

[Ozblu3]

Dirty Sex Jokes - Voodoo Dick

[haggler]

What was John Lennon's last hit?
The pavement.

Why did Princess Diana drive in a Mercedes?
She wouldn't be seen dead in a Skoda.

What's red and blue and doesn't like sex very much?
A rape victim.

What's 18 inches long and makes women scream in the night?
Cot death.

Whats got one ball and properly ****s women. Levi Bellfields hammer.

[PeeJay]

Red and blue?

[piazza]

Red and blue?

I assumed it meant bruised and bloodied.

[Carlo]

Pervert pulls up outside a schoolgate and says to a little girl 'if I give you some sweeties will you come in my car'
She says 'if you give me the bag you can come in mouth'

(Oldie, I know)