Manchester United Talk banner

1 - 7 of 7 Posts

4,956 Posts
Discussion Starter #1
You always hear about "the rules" according to women, however these are "the rules" according to men. Please note they are all labeled number 1 on purpose.

1. Breasts are for looking at and that is why men do so. Do not try to change that.

1. Learn to work the toilet seat. If it's up, put it down. Men need it up, women need it down. You don't hear men complaining about women leaving it down.

1. Saturday=Sports. It is like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.

1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, men will never think of it as one.

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want. Just to make it clear:
Subtle hints DO NOT work
Strong hints DO NOT work
Obvious hints DO NOT work

1. Yes and no are perfectly acceptable answers to most questions.

1. Come to a man with a problem ONLY if you want help solving it. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

1. A headache that lasts 17months IS A PROBLEM. See a doctor.

1.Anything men have said six months earlier becomes inadmissible in an argument. In fact all comments become null and void after 7 days.

1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask a man.

1. If something a male says can be interpreted in two ways, one of which makes you sad or angry, the man meant the other one.

1. Either ask a man to do something or tell them how to do it. DO NOT do both. If a female already knows the best way of doing it, do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible say whatever you have to say during comercials.

1. Christopher Columbus did not need directions. Neither does any other man.

1. All men see in 16 colours, like Windows default settings.
Peach IS a fruit.
Pumpkin IS a fruit.
Men do not know what mauve is.

1. If it itches it will be scratched. Men do that.

1. If a male asks a female what is wrong, and she answers "nothing", the male will act like nothing is wrong. Despite knowing that something is in fact wrong, it's just not worth the hassle.

1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer too, expect an answer you don't want to hear.

1. When you go somewhere together, ANYTHING you wear will be fine. Really.

1. Do not ask a man what he's thinking unless you are willing to discuss;

1. A woman ALWAYS has enough clothes.

1. A woman ALWAYS has too many shoes.

1. A man is always in shape. Round, is a shape.

1. Finally, thank you for reading this, any men showing this to their girlfriends understand they will be sleeping on the sofa tonight. HOWEVER, did you know that men really do not mind the sofa? It's like camping.

1,572 Posts
So true ay, good stuff. Now to go to some adult dating online service and see if anyone will abide by these 'laws'.

4,956 Posts
Discussion Starter #6
Ajant said:
So true ay, good stuff. Now to go to some adult dating online service and see if anyone will abide by these 'laws'.
I always abide by these rules.......................................yeah right !!
1 - 7 of 7 Posts