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23. Kaka

If he’s not interested in money why do AC Milan have to pay him £173,000 a week?

5. Rotation

You pay £50 for a ticket, you spend £10 on a pint of beer and a hotdog and you get to watch a kickabout between a bunch of kids no-one’s ever heard of. Thanks Arsene. Thanks Rafa. Thanks Alex. Nice to know you care.

Thank God for modern football. :D
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